When I took this picture, I had no idea what I was going to do with it. I was just fascinated by this odd collection of items that greeted me at Walmart, so I took the picture in amusement (my lucky husband gets to see these weird pictures on our iCloud photostream – I’m sure he just shakes his head and wonders why he married me). You can’t see all of it in the picture, but at the entrance of this Walmart there were a bunch of haphazard, unrelated items: big flat-screen TVs, bananas, rotisserie chickens, school/office supplies, chips and snack foods, Clorox wipes, Duck Dynasty plastic-ware, etc. I wondered if this arrangement was mandated from the top or if the local manager was just ADD. I almost interrupted the morning employee pep rally (going on in the background of this picture) to ask them if there was some marketing genius behind the perplexing display.
We all have our own Walmart stories, biases, and prejudices (Keith and I laugh hysterically at the outrageous pictures on peopleofwalmart.com). Frankly, I don’t like going there because I always end up buying more than I intended (because, let’s be honest, stuff is cheaper and I think they disperse some sort of special “air” that convinces you that you need things you didn’t realize you needed or wanted). Keith really hates Walmart and if I ever need for him to get rid of any pent-up sarcasm, all I have to do is take him to Walmart and let him go. So when I looked at this picture again, I was feeling kind of “judgy” and superior, thinking “what in the world is wrong with them, putting such an odd assortment of items at the front of the store? Is anyone really going to be tempted to buy a flat-screen TV sitting beside a rotisserie chicken?”
Then I had a horrible realization, that maybe my life looks similar to this erratic Walmart scene. Now, unlike Walmart execs, I try hard not to showcase my neuroses, but you don’t have to know me for very long to realize I’m not even close to normal. Can’t I at least look more like Target? Better yet, Barnes and Noble, TJ Maxx or Krispy Kreme! My husband’s “store personality” would probably be the Apple Store – clean, smart, bright, focused, efficient, mildly overpriced. How the hell did an Apple store man end up with a Walmart woman? A topic for another day . . .
It would be nice if my life looked all put together like a high-end store window display or an Apple Store. I know women who seem to pull this off – you know, the thin, fit, well-rested woman who can homeschool her eight kids while never raising her voice, who grows her own food, lovingly makes gifts with her crafty, well-manicured hands, loves to cook and clean, and every closet has neatly stacked, labeled plastic bins like something right out of the container store catalog. When I see women like this, I always wonder what they are hiding, and I speculate that maybe they are medicated, maybe they are doing something naughty that no one knows about, maybe they secretly beat their pets or scream into their pillow at night or something. In some ways I’d love to be more like the window display woman, but in other ways, the thought of it just makes me want to throw up. It’s not real, and it’s exhausting to strive for something that is not real.
I gave up on sophisticated a long time ago. (I’m pretty sure Keith gave up too, about the time we took our first trip to Napa, and while wine tasting, I was saying things like, “Mmm, that’s got a nice whang to it!”) But it has taken me awhile to accept that I’m just never going to be one of those “put-together” people. I’m probably always going to look like the oddball entrance at that crazy Walmart, and that’s okay with me, as long as God can use it.
A few years ago, I ran across a helpful quote (by Cathrine Aird): “If you can’t be a good example, then you’ll just have to be a horrible warning.” That’s exactly how I feel sometimes. God might not be able to use my life as a good example, but He can still use it, even if it’s a warning, or an example of what not to do.
I have learned through the years that God can use our lives, no matter what sort of “odd collection” we might have to work with. My life is never going to look perfect and put together – many of us probably look a lot like that crazy Walmart entrance, but that’s okay. It’s weird and disorganized but it’s real life.
Hmm, I’m feeling the urge to drag my Apple store husband to Walmart for a sarcastic rant, a rotisserie chicken and a flat-screen TV. . . And on the way, I’ll play him some Ricky Skaggs tunes on my iPhone. Yep, a Walmart girl in an Apple Store world. I can handle that.
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Now I know why God uses me. I used to feel guilty when we went to conferences and meetings with evangelists and their wives. The wives looked so “put together ” and such organized “women of God”, then there was me. They were the “perfect” mates and I felt so “imperfect.” I used to wonder why God wanted me to work with Dale. Now I know! He wanted others to see that there are people who are not perfect and He could use them, too. Well, now you know – you came from a “Walmart” mom. Love you!
I chuckled reading this post as we can each relate to various parts of it!!! Actually, I laughed aloud!! My WalMart/ Apple relationship is in the intelluctual category!!! Claire is already laughing! I am married to a disorganized, messy intellectual GENIUS who is so full of eccentricities that he is adorable! We have been in love since second grade, so I knew what type of guy I was marrying!! I often wonder how he could possibly have chosen this WalMart level intellect !!
Your Mother’s response is great!
Funny…I’ve always thought of you as a fine example (Bloomingdales?) of so many things! Looking forward to your first book signing! Hugs.
Hey Girl,
I am not even going to try and reply to that one. I think you know yourself well and that you are ready to be the Walmart kind of girl God created you to be. The Apple store is great, but you have to be a certain kind of gullible person to relate to that type of hype. However, being a Walmart person has its advantages, because it manages to entice most of the world’s population and not the always the educated section of the world. It is not the biggest retail store for nothing. The Apple store is great, but just check out the stats of how many people visit the Apple store compared to Walmart. Being the biggest is not always better, but I can promise you that those Walmart people will enjoy life while the Apple store people will be looking for the next best app. Hang in there Walmart girl because your Apple man depends on you. Take away his apps and his executive world and he will be begging at your feet for a cart full of Walmart bargains. Great blog..
Your Walmart Sucker Dad
Time to get this stuff published! Love it!
I Love this one!! It is so me!! Was just thinking this morning why I am never able to get my house in order for any long period of time? There is always chaos, always a project to tackle, always something missing that I “desperately” need. I was looking at that list of insanely easy ways to organize your home and it actually pressure and overwhelmed me! But it was called insanely easy. Not for me:)
Thank you for sharing this:)
Karen